Cryin' at Walmart

So, two weekends ago, I do believe I had a parental rite of passage. Hubby and I decided to head out to do some Christmas shopping with the little man in tow. This is not usually an issue since Haeden is generally happy to sit in the cart and flirt with passersby. He is also pretty good about entertaining himself by putting items into the back of the grocery cart or trying to pull things off of shelves. And if there is a free cookie involved... he's almost always an angel.

I really should have seen this coming though. I mean, does anyone ever go to Wal-Mart and actually leave in a good mood? I know I don't, so why should Haeden be any different? Well, apparently he's not. We entered through the garden area and I don't know if they were already preparing for Black Friday, or what, but they had rows and rows of bicycles set up. And behind those were the many battery-operated Power Wheels. Um, Haeden wanted them ALL. He didn't care that he was too small for every single one of them. The whining and squirming started almost immediately as he pointed in that direction and said, "BIIIII!" I tried to appease him by letting him sit in one of the Power Wheel Jeeps. However, since he can't sit still for more than 30 seconds, he wanted to move on pretty quickly, and Daddy was still busy checking out bike gears and breaks, or some such thing that made him oblivious to the noise Haeden was already making. When he eventually did take notice, he took the little bugger from me and sat him on the bike he was inspecting looking at. We pushed him around for a second and made all the usual VROOM VROOM sounds, but it did no good. Haeden's feet could not reach the pedals, his chubby little hands could not reach the handle bars. Little dude was pissed!

I don’t know why we thought he’d act any differently inside, but that’s exactly where we took him next. As soon as we reached the bikes, he immediately started to flip out again. I unsuccessfully tried to distract him with toy trucks! and stuffed animals!!??, but quickly realized that I needed to just get him away from the area altogether. He calmed down pretty quickly, but I was growing rather impatient walking around with Haeden on my hip and waiting on the Lord of the Bikes. I kept trying to peek around the corner at him, craning my neck to assert the “hurry the hell up glare” and simultaneously keep Haeden from spotting him or the bikes, but it wasn’t working. He was completely oblivious to my plight.
Eventually he found “the chosen one” and met me in one of the other aisles, bike in tow. Haeden took one look at the bike and the show started all over again. The whines turned to screams, the arms and legs began to flail and we were officially having our first full-on public tantrum.

You guys, I was THAT mom with THAT kid in Wal-Mart. I took one look at Dan and told him we were going to just see him at the car. I tried to walk as quickly as I could and hoped that he’d quiet down again once Hubby and the bike were out of sight, but he only got louder and louder. People may or may not have suffered some whiplash trying to get a look at all the commotion we HE was making as we walked past. I believe I heard a few people snickering, too, and can only hope that they were laughing with me (with sympathy, of course) and not at me.

Haeden kicked and screamed all the way out to the car. He even did the stiff arms and legs deal as I tried to buckle him into the car seat. Ohhhh, man, was he testing my patience. Finally, I had a moment of genius and handed him some goldfish crackers and he calmed right down. It was a Christmas Miracle.

Look at that face! He's so picked on and abused!

Pinky's Up

What am I, the Queen of England?!

*Canister in kitchen, chock full of tea bags, not shown



I cleaned out some cabinets last night preparing for our yard sale today. Apparently, the hubby and I are hoarding tea.

Scaredy Cat

Those of you who know me are already quite aware that I'm a total wuss. I wouldn't go as far as saying that I'm afraid of the dark or anything, but I don't know that my hubby would even back me up on that statement!

I'm sure that I've always been this way, too. I can remember watching a particular episode commercial for "Are You Afraid of the Dark" on Nickelodeon and being afraid to sleep by myself because the commercial showed a kid sleeping peacefully  in bed and then pans up to show that there is a ghost hovering above him. It fah-reaked me out! You guys, I was even scared of the movie Ernest Scared Stupid! There is a scene where the girl hears something and is afraid to get off her bed because she thinks a troll is hiding underneath. She finally gets the courage to look and, of course, it's nothing but her teddy bear. She sits back up with a sigh of relief, only to turn her head and find the troll laying next to her! I realize this sounds silly now, but this scene sometimes still haunts me!

So, to recap, I am totally freaked out by anything even remotely scary. As a result, I'm quite jumpy. And since we all know that misery loves company, I am forever trying to sneak up on people to scare them. I do this to both my mom and my hubby on a regular basis. Hubby pretty much expects it and so I almost never have the satisfaction of scaring him. And even when I do, I usually have to ask because it isn't like he lets out a high-pitched scream. I wish he did. I'd totally post it, too.

You know who does scream at the top of their lungs when someone jumps out at them?! Yeah, that'd be me. And that's what happened last night. I unsuccessfully tried to scare Dan when we were heading to bed. Then I realized that I forgot to grab the laundry out of the dryer, so I ran out to the garage to grab it,  turning on lights as I went, of course! I came back in and before I turned off the dining room light, I tried to peer into the hallway to make sure he wasn't going to try and jump out at me. All clear, so I turned off the light and began to walk through the living room when I heard a noise. A growly-hissy noise. You know the kind. Then there was something coming towards me. And I screamed. And backed up into the table. And then there was a bunch of giggling coming from the hubby. That bastard. I didn't even have time to react once I realized it was only him. First, because I woke Haeden up and he started crying almost immediately and second, because I had to run and pee. This bladder ain't what it used to be.

Karma sucks, you guys. Be careful out there!

Steppin Out... Football Edition

This week's Steppin' Out is a little stretched... but Mandy said no rules, riiiight?! Also, it looks as though I will never actually "step out" on Saturday. Obviously because I'm a rebel and not because I'm lazy or forgetful. Duh!

Every year we try to take the older boys to a Jaguars game. This year, we could not have chosen a better date. The weather was beautiful* and we actually won! I'll be honest here, I don't really care much about football (shocker!) but it's hard not to get into the spirited frenzy when you actually attend the game. I might watch the people around us a little more than what's happening on the field, but it's all a part of the experience, right?! I was actually paying attention when it counted though because I totally witnessed the friggin' PLAY OF THE YEAR! For those of you that didn't, let me paint a picture...

The game is tied. The Jags get the ball with 8 seconds to go. Everyone thinks they're going to just take a knee and go to overtime, but NO! They threw the ball... or ran it? I don't really know because I was texting our sitter at this point to let her know it was going to overtime. Ha! But, basically they get a little further down the field and now there are only 3 seconds left! The quarterback throws the ol' Hail Mary pass a good 50 yards down the field and a Houston defender in the end zone bats it down... but not down to the ground like he intended, oh no, he put it right into the hands of one of our receivers right at the half-yard line! He took one step over the line for an amazing win!  They don't call them the "cardiac kids" for nothing! Wooooo!

Okay, enough foot ball talk. I'm beginning to sound like my hubby. On to the photo:

Boys: Representin' with their Jags Jerseys! Dan's is great because it has our last name on the back and his number was actually his first football number from when he was a young lad. Awwww, memories!
Me: Jags sweatshirt. You can't really see it, but very comfy and cute... but freaking $65 dollars! Good thing my sugar daddy paid for it.  And Sunglasses from Target.