This Little Piggy Laughed And Laughed All The Way Home!

Laughing Haeden 3-21-10, originally uploaded by jaxschlan.

My little man here is easily amused. He is laughing at me pretending to sneeze. I stole his pacifier and each time I sneezed I would spit it out. He couldn't get enough of it, and I can't get enough of him!

Blended So Splendid

This was a fun day. One of those days that I will hold onto for a while. The kind you think back on when you're upset and irritable, having picked up half-full glasses of juice or dirty socks (OMG the smell that emanates from a pre-teen's foot... you can almost see it!) for the thousandth time.

I wish all of our days were like that. Everyone relaxed and smiling. But that's not life. It isn't always a walk in the park, folks.

You all know I'm a stepmom, right? It's hard. Probably  The hardest thing I've ever done. And what rewards there are come few and far between. Sometimes I worry that I might be considered the "Evil Stepmother" (thanks Disney!). But it's so hard (did I mention it was hard?) to know your place. Either I mother the boys and bake them brownies, do their laundry, help with the homework, or I neglect them. Like any kid, they need to be taught responsibility, proper manners, the importance of doing well in school.

But they already have a mother. I don't know whether or not she really deserves that title, but it's hers. We all know that is one thing that will never change. I can teach them things and I can love them, but I will never take her place. So, I am left with the same question. Where do I fit in? Am I a mother figure or am I a friend?  My guess is that I need to fall somewhere in-between. Easier said than done, my friends. I have a long way to go, but I'm working on it.

I can, however, share with you the one thing that I am sure of. The little reward that is so often hard to come by,? It is this:

These boys love their little brother. And he absolutely adores them. His little face lights up when they enter the room. The grins and giggles follow shortly after. It doesn't get a whole lot better than that.

A Couple of Funnies

Haeden is an absolute clown. And not the scary kind either. He definitely has a sense of humor already and we see a little more of it everyday. I'm pretty sure that indicates some sort of genius, right? haha! Anyway, when Dan and I went to pick up Haeden from Grandma Ellie's house on Friday she had a cute story to share. And, friends, this is your lucky day because I'm going to share it with you!

Grandma Ellie was in the kitchen fixing some lunch while Haeden was in her bedroom, hanging out in his walker. He was supposed to be watching some Baby Einstein, however, she could hear him pulling at her dresser drawer handles. She heard something open and started to call his name since he was obviously up to no good. She then heard the click-click-click of the walker wheels and a little heh-heh-heh (sounds like a puppy dog panting) as Haeden came racing out of her bedroom waving her, ahem, undergarment in the air like some sort of white flag! I can totally picture the proud little look he must have had on his face. He just gets cuter and cuter every day!

Speaking of cute, I have a quick story about my hubby to share with you as well. Last night Dan prepared a scrumptious dinner for the family. Spaghetti and meat sauce, yum! We're all seated at the table and Patrick passed him the parmesan cheese. He must have decided it was going to need a good shake before he would be able to get out the desired amount. He closed the side with the three holes and began to shake it vigorously. I'm sure you can see exactly where this is going... quite suddenly the other side popped open and he dumped half the container all over himself and the table, somehow missing his plate of spaghetti entirely. There were a couple of seconds of silence as the boys and I stared at him in disbelief. Then, of course, we all burst out in laughter! After wiping his face and glasses clean, he actually had to go outside to shake all the cheese off of his clothes!

We should clearly have our own reality show. This sounds like good TV to me!

Time to be Creative

Before Haeden was born I had plenty of time. Time to cook, time to clean, time to learn something new, to craft, to knit, whatever my heart desired. Of course, at that point in my life, I didn't really have any interest in those things! I was quite content to lay around the house watching TV every evening or stay in bed until 10am on the weekends.

Now that I have a 10 month-old gobbling up all of my time like an afternoon snack, I find myself constantly looking for more to do. I really don't know why that is since the only actual free time that I have any more is the hour and a half between Haeden's bedtime and my own. And yes, I have a bedtime. It's 10pm and it is quite imperative that I am in a deep sleep before 11pm. It's better for all of us that way. Trust me.

So, basically I have roughly an hour each night to relax with my Hubby, and instead I'm running around trying to cut and glue silhouettes of Haeden's perfect little profile, teach myself how to knit (that one isn't going so well), and make DIY greeting cards, invitations, etc. And since that isn't enough, I am going to learn to sew because I want to make Haeden's 1st birthday t-shirt and, of course, a multitude of other things!

I keep asking myself where this is all coming from. I know that part of the answer is just that I want to have a creative outlet. Or, in truth, I just want to BE creative. Sometimes I really feel that I am just fighting against the tide. I do believe that I'm more "left brained", meaning that I'm more logical in my thinking. I am not the type of person who generally comes up with new ideas. Hell, I have a hard time deviating from recipes!

I think creativity is a way of being. Maybe even a process. I hope that if I open myself up to it and also to the possibility of actually failing, it might become easier. More natural. It just might be that I am concentrating too hard on being creative. And where is the imagination in that?


*Edited to add: I realize that I started out talking about one thing and ended up on a different topic, but someone very wise recently told me that it's a blog, and it's my blog. I should write what I want because I'm not being graded! (Whew!)